Everything I really need to know I learned from Noah's Ark:


1. Plan ahead. It wasn't raining when Noah build the ark.
2. Stay fit. When you're 600 years old, someone might ask you to do something Really big.
3. Don't listen to critics. Do what has to be done.
4. Build on the high ground.
5. For safety's sake, travel in pairs.
6. Two heads are better than one.
7. Speed isn't always an advantage. The cheetahs were on board, but so was the snails.
8. If you can't fight or flee - float.
9. Take care of your animals as if they were the last ones on earth.
10. Don't forget that we're all in the same boat.
11. Stay below deck during the storm.
12. Remember that the ark was built by amateurs & the Titanic was built by professionals.
13. If you have to start over, have a friend by your side.
14. No matter how bleak it looks, there's always a rainbow on the other side.
15. DON'T MISS THE BOAT !!!!

 

What did Noah say as he was loading the Ark?
"Now I herd everything"

What animal could Noah not trust?
The cheetah

What kind of lights did Noah have on the ark?
Flood lights

What did God say when Noah told him he wanted to build the ark out of bricks?
"No, Noah -- go for wood"

Who was the first canning factory run by?
Noah - he had a boat full of preserved pairs

Was Noah the first one out of the Ark?
No, he came fourth out of the ark

Which animal took the most baggage into the arc?
What animal took the least?
The elephant took his trunk.
But the fox and the rooster took only a brush and comb between them,

What creatures were not on the arc?
Fish

Where did Noah keep the bees?
In the ark hives.

Who was the best financier in the Bible?
Noah. He floated his stock while the whole world was in liquidation.

Where was Noah when the lights went out?
In d'ark.

Why couldn't Noah catch many fish?
He only had two worms.

When is paper money first mentioned in the Bible?
When the dove brought the green back to the ark.

What did the cat say when the ark landed?
Is that Ararat?

 

 

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